Our Dossier is Complete

This afternoon I received our last Authentication in the mail. I just finished Express mailing our Dossier to our agency. We are DONE! They said that they will be sending it out to China next Friday. They only send them out on Fridays. So we definately could have a LID by the time next month's shared list comes out. Please pray for a quick LID!

News on Locking a Child

So it appears that with this shared list comes new requirements. Apparently now in order for you to lock a child's file you need to have a log in date (LID). This is the date you get when your Dossier is logged in after it gets to China. We don't have one this month so we are not eligible to lock a file. Hopefully next month we will have our LID. I know that this is all in God's plan. It is just one of the many ups and downs of adoption.

Waiting for the List

Right now we are still waiting for our Authentication to come back, and I'm sure it will be here by the end of the week. But we are also waiting for the new shared list to come out to see if our daughter is on that list. As of yesterday it had still not come out, but they anticipate that it will be out "any time now". So hopefully we will know by the end of this week whether we have found our daughter this month or not. If not, the next list will come out in about a month from now. It is like checking every month to see if you are pregnant! (smile)

Our LAST Authentication Document

Yesterday I express mailed our last document to the Chinese Embassy to be Authenticated. When we get that back next week I will send my Dossier (all of my thousands of documents..or so it seems) to our agency. They will then send it off to China. If we can get it to China by March 1st we will have completed our paper chase in five months. Not bad considering the hold up with USCIS.

Missing my Baby

It is mid way through February and we are almost finished with all the paper work that is required to request a child from China. I can't believe that it has been four and a half months since we started on this paper chase. It was good for me to do it through the holidays because I have definately been focused on other things and not just the adoption. I am hoping that by the beginning of March we will have our Dossier (paper work) in China. Then comes the hard part for me...the wait. Now don't get me wrong, I know that we will not be waiting as long as most people do. I know that there are people on the non special needs list that have been in this process for four years! And I know that many others will wait MUCH longer to find their child. For me, I am ok if I feel like I am "doing" something. The paper work has been easy for me because I am organized and I felt as if I was accomplishing something. After the Dossier goes to China, my part is finished and I have to just wait on the Lord for the rest. I have gotten better about this in my life, but I am nowhere near perfect in the patience area. I do have a peace that we will find Ashlyn when the time is right. God has already written this story and I can do nothing to alter the timing of His plan. His timing is PERFECT. So I hope with this knowledge in my heart that the time will not bother me so much as I wait to see my little girl's face for the first time.

Being a mom to four bio children and knowing a mother's love for her child, it is a strange feeling to love someone who you know nothing about, except that she was made for you and your family by God. I don't love any one of them more than the other, it just amazes me how much I already love this child who God has put in my heart. This is definately much harder to me than pregnancy. Harder on my heart I mean. When I was pregnant (and I always have rough pregnancies physically), at least I knew that my child was growing well and I could feel them and attach to them. I have nothing with this "pregnancy" except what God has given me emotionally for this child. I do believe that God has given me a little of His love for her in my heart. I am not worried about her well being because I know that He is protecting her and taking care of her. I do miss her terribly! Sometimes I just want to look at her sweet face. We always wonder what our children will look like when we are pregnant. Well, I find that I want to know that more with this child, probably because I don't have the attachment of physically feeling her move. Also knowing that I am missing out on part of her life is not an easy pill to swallow...for any mother. I think that hurts the most. But these children do not belong to us, they are God's. And He is with her. It is not me who can do all for her, it is Him alone. I have to know that this is what He has always had planned for her life and accept that I am just a part of her life that God chose to give her. I pray that I can be all for my children that I need to be, so they can grow to be the people that God needs them to be in this world.

Our Last Certification

Sorry I am a little late at posting this, but our house has had the nasty flu going around. Donny is the only one of the six of us who has not caught it yet.

Monday I sent our last document out Express mail to be Certified by the State. As soon as this comes back I will be sending it off to be Authenticated. I can not believe that our paper work is almost complete. It really has not been that bad. Hopefully the wait for our referral won't be too long.

51 Days! That's Right, 51 Days!

I just found out that our I800A was approved on January 30th. That is 51 days! Not 120 days like we were originally told. My adoption agency said that was the fastest they have seen. Yeah! Now I need to get the approval Certified by the state and then Authenticated by the Chinese Embassy in Houston. After that our dossier is done! Now all we need to do is find our little girl! Thanks for praying with us!